How to help your teen persevere in school

In a school context, a student who perseveres demonstrates tenacity, determination, and patience in the face of learning and educational tasks. This attitude allows them to overcome the obstacles they encounter and have confidence in their ability to succeed. On the contrary, when perseverance is not present, it frequently goes hand in hand with a lack of motivation, involvement, and satisfaction with the school environment.

As a parent, you have a major influence on your children's educational path, regardless of their age. 

A parent's role is therefore crucial to a young person's school perseverance. This article offers a selection of concrete methods that you can use to help your child pursue their educational goals.

Valuing school as a positive experience

For a young person to see school as a positive part of their life, it's important for you to adopt this attitude as well. Discussions about the value of school and the learning and activities your child has done during the day will help them make sense of their school experience.

Avoid saying:

"Do your homework before dinner! That way you'll get it out of the way and can do whatever you want to do after."

Instead, say:

"Do you want to look together at what you learned today and what homework you have to do?"

Valuing effort as much as results

A teenager who is struggling in school often doubts themselves and may think that their difficulties are insurmountable. Remember that despite their quest for independence, your teenager needs your encouragement and recognition! That's why it's important to express your confidence in them and their potential. This helps assure them that they have the ability to persist, despite the obstacles they face. It is important to value all of your teen's efforts! Even if the results don't improve in the time frame you expect, you can tell them that they are still choosing to engage in behaviours that allow them to progress. This shows that they're dealing with the challenges they face along the way.

This advice can be applied by recognizing your child's efforts, successes, strengths, positive attitudes and progress. This way, you can congratulate them and express your pride, while avoiding comparing them to others.

Avoid:

Focusing only on a test score, especially comparing it to the group average.

Instead:

Emphasize the effort your teen put into preparing for the exam.

Explain that failure is an essential part of learning

Avoid giving the impression that failures threaten your teen's worth, success or future. In school, as in any area of life, failure itself is a learning experience and the next time you try, you'll be able to go further! With this in mind, it is important to set realistic expectations that respect your child's learning pace.

Avoid:

Acting as if an exam is the child's only chance, saying that they won't have any other opportunities to catch up.

Instead:

Offer to discuss what they didn't understand and how they can improve.

Get involved in your child's learning

Parental involvement in learning shows the student that they are supported in their academic progress. This is done, among other things, by engaging in discussions with them about what they are learning, what they are experiencing at school, the ups and downs they are facing, etc. Offering and helping with study and homework is another great sign of support. It is also important to get involved by going to meetings organized by the school. Using school resources, such as the portal or web platforms used by teachers, is also valuable.

Avoid :

Leaving the teenager to fend for themselves in their academic journey.

Instead :

Show them that their parents are a source of help and support for them.

Applying the various tips discussed in this article takes time and patience. For them to work, they may need to be tried one at a time and implemented at key moments for your child.

Finally, it is important to remember that a teenager is encouraged to persevere when they feel like their parents also value school. It is also important to focus on what they do in the school setting and who they are as a student. In the end, the support they receive from their parents is an invaluable tool that gives them confidence in their abilities and helps them find meaning in their studies.

References (in French)

Alloprof parents, La persévérance scolaire
Espace parents, La persévérance, ça s'apprend !
Réseau réussite Montréal, Agir en tant que parent
Jobboom, La persévérance, l'ingrédient secret de la réussite !